Rockstar Hangover

Energy drinks are my generation’s form of uppers. Liquid crack, if you must. Anyone who tells you that energy drinks don’t affect them is lying to your face and should be justly punished. Obviously, there is a physical effect. But mentally, you receive an unlimited supply of focus. Unless of course, you overdose. There are especially strong energy drinks. Rockstar is the standard…I purchased a gigantic 24 oz. “tropical punch” (more like blood) Rockstar to study for my test last night. First of all, I should not have started drinking it at 10:00 p.m. I can usually count on an energy drink working it’s magic for around five hours. Perfect timing to study for my test! But, I failed to factor in two things:

1. It was a gigantic 24 oz. Rockstar…
2. The five hours don’t really kick in until the whole thing is gone (which for me, was around 1:30 a.m.)

Anyway, I did okay on my exam and didn’t piss red, so all in all the night was worth it. The main complaint I have is how un-freaking-comfortable I was trying to fall asleep. I have a huge, soft bed. Perfect amount of darkness. Warm blankets. Snoring puppy curled at my feet. But I was basically in a void of nothingness. I was nearly unconscious. I was experiencing INCEPTION! Just kidding…although it did feel like I was having an out-of-body experience (does the warning on the can’s label say anything about THAT? Didn’t think so…)

If a computer that is “shut down” is a human “asleep,” then I was a computer asleep. Does that make sense? I was just laying there, existing; nothing else. Humming. My heart was beating extremely fast and everything about me felt tired, but the actual act of sleeping just wouldn’t happen. Finally, around 5:30 a.m. (wake up call at 9), the buzz faded and I was able to sleep. Needless to say, waking up was not fun. I’m still not having much fun as I write this, sitting through my fourth long class of the day. One paper and two more tests to go this week – let’s hope I survive.

Moral of the story: if you must drink liquid crack, or as it is more commonly referred to, “Rockstar,” start early and drink in moderation. You’ll thank me.

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